In Which I Discuss Hair

Hair.  That arch-nemesis of all things human and female.  *shudders*

It's that weird, stringy, knotty, curly, straight, flat, poofy, uncooperative stuff that grows on your head and mine.  It's controversial.

Needless to say, I've spent as much time trying to work out a peace negotiation with my hair as any other girl. I'm not sure we've come to terms yet--let me give you a short debriefing on It.  It (meaning Hair) is medium-length, with a few leftover layers, somewhere between light brown and dishwater blonde, flat with a hint of wave, and generally in pretty healthy shape.  I'm trying to grow it out.  It's not.

Hair is remarkably contrary that way. You want it to do something. As soon as you ask it to do this something, even if it's been doing it for years, it immediately stands up indignantly and shouts "NO!" in your face.  Hair needs better manners.

I mean, imagine the thousands of special days Hair has ruined for poor girls all over the globe.  Their wedding. Their birthday. You name it, it's been ruined by their uncaring, unthoughtful Hair frizzing up, falling down, flattening spontaneously, falling down, going straight, falling down, going curly, and falling down. You wonder what Hair has against humanity, anyway.

And then, wonder of wonders, there's the rare woman who is actually on happy terms with her hair.  There are a few ways of this.

#1:  She leaves Hair to do its own thing, not caring what that thing might be, and both parties coexist happily.

#2:  She has what they commonly call a "do," and through years of blowing, curling, straightening, perming, blowing, snipping, spraying, and mousseing, she has battered its self-will down to servial submission. Both parties coexist (though only one is probably happy). This is not a healthy example of symbiosis.

#3:  She is stuck somewhere between those two, trying to get Hair to obey her, succeeding occasionally, but more often then not simply imprisoning it in a rubber band.

I am #3 through and through!

I've tried keeping Hair in a "do" consistently, but Hair doesn't like that and neither do I.  Too much work, too much time, and Hair is not conducive to school.

My latest escapade with Hair was attempting the "vintage" look--twisting, twirling, heating and cooling into a charming, curly fluff-ball of perfection.  Well, it worked for about two days.

So, any good-for school, quick-and-easy hair ideas?  I'm just not that willing to spend that much time on Hair, contrary to its ideas.

At least the stuff can't scream and cry when you lay scissors to it. What a relief.

Comments

  1. Poor Laurie. Sounds just like my hair! HA!

    Okay, here's a list.

    1. Messy bun - very fast, easy, quick and cool. Not to mention, leaves your hair in curls after wearing it for a day.
    2. Curls! Wash hair and when damp, add mousse. Blow dry and curl with hot roller in tight sections. Then finger comb through and add a little hairspray.
    3. Braids? They're adorable at age 6, "childish" at age 12 and "cool and vintage" at age 15+ :)
    4. Flip? Gather hair into a ponytail, twist up side of head, pin with octopus clips and let rest hang down over back.
    5. Headbands! Put them on and pull straight and slick back, then let your hair go natural everywhere else?

    Just a few things that I like. :)

    ReplyDelete

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